Treasure Hunting

Monday, March 29, 2010

The only piece of furniture Bill and I have purchased for our house is our couch. Everything else has been given to us--and it's all in fabulous condition. Well, in fabulous condition except for my Lazy Boy recliner circa 1982 that has my perfect rear end print in it. I'm not calling my rear end perfect, but a print that fits my rear end perfectly ;) That chair is a whole other post--which I will do someday if I get a new chair... Anyway, about the couch. We were fairly young and inexperienced when we bought the couch. It is the world's stupidest couch. I regret buying it, but I refuse to buy a new one until everyone is potty trained, no longer spits up, and stops spilling. This couch shows watermarks--when we clean it, it leaves a ring where the water dries. The cushions don't come out so you can't flip or fluff them. You have to pull the back cushions out or you fall in the cracks. While these are all annoyances, nothing is more annoying than when you lose something in it.

The first thing we ever lost was the remote. We had been searching for days and then I wondered if it had fallen in the couch. We tipped the couch to the front and heard, clink clack bang. There was something in there. However, the lovely design of the couch included fabric covering the bottom. There is no way to get whatever fell inside the couch without cutting a hole in it. So we did. And out came our remote. We have lost varying things and gotten them out by tipping the couch and working to get the items to the hole so we can pull them out. Recently, Rori lost her cartridge game for her Leap.ster. We searched everywhere we thought it could be but couldn't find it. Bill never wants to tip the couch and look for something--he finds it inconvenient ;) So on Friday while he was at work, I tipped it. It's quite heavy, but I've been working out, you know ;)  I heard, clankety clack, clankety clack. There was no way that I could hold the couch up and finagle all the things I could feel through the fabric over to the hole (I haven't been working out that much!). So, I proceded to cut several slits in the couch bottom. It was quite the treasure hunt. I found an Ariel mini doll, a Snow White mini doll, a Lightning McQueen car, two barettes, my night face lotion that I had been looking for that Rori had swiped, the Leapster game, and a bunch of dirty kleenexes! Can I tell you how much I hate this stupid couch?!  Anytime something is missing, I'm pretty sure the couch ate it! Thank God we got hand-me down furniture in the rest of the house because if we had picked out the rest, with our skills, I think I'd have to burn it all and start from scratch!


Anna said...

Ha! We have a couch that eats things too. However...the company must have realized that and made a velcro flap along the bottom. Lift up the flap & everything falls out. The kids love "cleaning out the couch day". They ask to do it. You're is a treasure hunt. I'm not sure a "perfect" couch exists...but I'm sure the next one will be better.

Anonymous said...

Jaime, you are so funny! I love reading your blog because it always makes me smile! Just wondering if that is the same recliner that was in our apartment at Calvin 11 years ago!?! If it is, that was one comfortable piece of furniture!
Lisa Lummen

Anonymous said...

You were at Calvin 11 years ago?!! Like you said a week ago, you are getting old. even older than that chair!!!

Anonymous said...

Everytime I look in that couch for something I tie a life so I can get back out if it sucks me in! Is it too early to start potty training Brendan? I guess we need to get Liam trained 1st. I can not wait to burn that couch!!!--Bill

Jaime said...

Your comment made my day!!! My next post is just for you :)

Baba HooHoo said...

I feel like that couch is going to suck me up never mentioned the nail polish I tried to decorate the cushion with!